The Paradox of Trust: Why You Fear Being Judged

Trust is not perfect

Daily Stretch #28: Learn that trust is not perfect

When was the last time you cried? Did you feel loved in the past week? Have you ever thought about suicide? Did you hide a big mistake from your boss recently?

All these questions are intimidating. Whatever you reply says a lot about you.

When conducting this exercise in one of our workshops, people don’t feel intimidated at all. They open up and share their secrets in front of a group of strangers.

But, when we ask participants if they would answer those questions to someone who knows them well, they panic.

People feel free to share their secrets with strangers. But are afraid of being judged by their friends, family or co-workers.

That’s the paradox of trust: we have a hard time being candid with those we trust.

Reframing Trust into Something Imperfect

“Resentment is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies.” — Nelson Mandela

Trust is powerful and complex, but also volatile.

We have developed an idealized version of trus…